Are you tired of the same old boring Christmas tree? You’ve got your basic Santas, snowmen, and round glass ball ornaments on the tree year after year – isn’t it time for something a little different? You should be able to show your personality via your tree trimmings. Your deck the halls creativity deserves to blossom, instead of being stifled by the usual Christmas propaganda that dictates unwavering worship of the jolly red lord, Santa.
With the trio of Motherboard Christmas Ornaments (ThinkGeek, $19.99) you can showcase your ingenuity in the face of holiday monotony. Made from actual recycled motherboards, these ornaments will stand out on your tree as slightly unusual but also incredibly intriguing adornments. You get a bell, a star, and a tree in the set, with each shape’s motherboard material in a different color. To the untrained observer these ornaments may appear to be the standard Christmas fair, but upon closer inspection will reveal them to be fascinatingly unique.
And you get a set of three ornaments for less than what you’d pay for one generic looking ornament from any department store or retail chain. With this Christmas addition, you are most certainly shouting your geekdom from the rooftops, but also displaying your individuality and eclectic taste. Plus, they’re made from recycled motherboards, so you’re sure to impress the environmentally conscious lady in your life. You know, if that whole Star Wars geek thing wasn’t doing that for you already.
5 out of 5 stars.
Specs:
-Dimensions: 3.5″ across
-Made from recycled motherboards
-Silver hanging thread looped through each
-Packaged in a gift box
-Set of 3
You must think you’re pretty slick, huh? I heard you talking about how you’re all done with your Christmas shopping, have been for a month or so. Are you sure about that? Did you remember everyone on your list? Sure, you got the extended fam, but aren’t you forgetting someone? Think really, really hard. It’s someone you see every day, and perhaps take for granted. Seriously? You don’t know who it is yet? Wow, are you cold and unfeeling!
You should really consider purchasing the Reindeer Auto Outfit (Amazon, $9.95) for the gorgeous and reliable car in your life. I mean, isn’t your car always there for you? Who’s the one that gets you to your destination safely and promptly? Your car never asks you for anything, other than general maintenance and some gas so that it can continue to do your bidding with precision and care. Isn’t it about time you showed your car that you care? You could treat your car to a nice car wash and detailing, but you just had that done a few months ago for its birthday, and nobody likes a repeat gift. Floor mats are so last season, and really, that’s not enough to properly display your gratitude. Don’t even get me started on air fresheners – what a lame ass gift that is.
You need a gift that’s playful and unconventional, one that allows your car to have fun this holiday season. With a Reindeer Auto Outfit, your car will be the talk of the town. It will be like a holiday parade and your car is the star. The two reindeer antlers easily clip onto your windows and the button nose attaches to the hood’s grill, so it won’t interfere with your driving. There’s simply no excuse not to get this for your noble chariot this year. Remember, cars are people too.
3 out of 5 reindeer stars.
Specs:
-Includes two reindeer antlers and a button nose
-Clips to windows and hood’s grill
-Won’t damage finish
-Inventor licensed
Is there a special lady in your life? Did she happen to grow up in the 80s? If so, you’d better start thinking about what to get her for Christmas. It has to be something really special, something from the heart. I mean, you could go with a Rubiks cube, but I think that road has already been traveled. And I think the novelty might have worn off that amazing new technology called a CD player.
If you really want to impress your baby, the Dirty Dancing The Board Game (AreYouGame.com, $29.98) is the way to go. It’s a surefire sign to her that you’re not gonna let anyone put her in the corner. That’s right, take her back to the summer of ‘63 with the board game that cherishes the fine art of dance grindage and Patrick Swayze ballads. The game guides you through Baby and Johnny’s summer of love, with questions about quotes from the movie and a chance to reenact those famous dance scenes. With 396 challenge questions, you can forget about that embarrassing “I carried a watermelon” remark and relish in learning how to tone your spaghetti arms. All this leads up to the Talent Show Act at the end of the game, so you better not put your heel down and make sure you’ve practiced the lift.
A bit of warning: after you’ve played the game, you might be in for a month long tribute to “Be My Baby” and dance classes at the town hall. But come on, now you’ve got the moves, you’ve got the girl, and you’re just one 80s shag haircut away from being as badass as Patrick Swayze. Go on, take her to Kellerman’s.
4 out of 5 stars.
Specs:
-For 2-4 players
-Includes game board, 4 game pieces, 396 challenges, 36 Dirty Dancing Move cards, 30 Talent Show Act cards, die, and instructions
-Ages 12+
So let’s see, you’ve got your ornaments and remote controlled lights, what else do you need to start the holiday season? You probably need a new tree topper, seeing as last year’s was broken when you tried to put it on top of your new 8′ artificial tree by standing on a mountain of old newspapers that promptly slid out from under you as soon as you stepped on them. It’s really a shame because that was your Aunt Milly’s favorite Christmas decoration of the bunch, and now the whole family is blaming you for its demise (even though none of them offered to risk their lives climbing Mt. Christmas tree). Don’t fret, happens to every guy sometimes this does.
Get ready to save the day with the Kurt Adler Star Wars Yoda Tree Top (Amazon, $32.99). Sure, no one can dispute the brilliance that is Yoda, but do you really want him holding reign on top of your tree? Yes, use the force you must, and Christmas will you save. Yoda’s force will banish the Death Star, err the angry family from your Christmas celebration, from his perch atop your tree. This lighted tree topper features pretested push in bulbs, so you can be sure to bask in Yoda’s light as soon as you plug it in. In case of a stormtrooper attack or a burnt out bulb, it also comes with four replacement bulbs as well as an extra fuse. Don’t worry about connecting other light sources to the tree topper because it comes equipped with a special add on plug to allow the Force to flow through freely. Now, don’t get your Jedi robes in a bunch, but this tree topper is for indoor use only.
As Yoda would say, “You must feel the Force around you; here, between you, me, the tree, the rock, everywhere, yes.” That Yoda is a smart one, he is; he sure knows his Christmas trees.
5 out of 5 Jedi stars.
Specs:
-Dimensions: 10.1″ x 9.9″ x 2.9″
-Weight: 9.9 oz
-5′ lead green cord
-120V 60Hz AC
-Indoor use only
-Lighted tree topper
-Pretested push in bulbs
-Comes with 4 replacement bulbs and 1 extra fuse
-Special add on plug for connecting additional light sets
The clock is ticking – only 23 more days until Christmas. Have you started decorating yet? I know, it’s a little early, after all, Thanksgiving was just a week ago. But come on, I know you’re itching to string those lights, roast those chestnuts, and hang your mistletoe. Have you thought about how you’re going to decorate the tree this year? Don’t you want to snazz it up a bit from last year’s?
With the 3 Outlet Westinghouse Holiday F/X Remote (Walmart, $12.00) you can pretty much guarantee that your Christmas tree will be anything but boring. This little duo, albeit just a touch cheesy, is actually pretty great because it allows you to change your standard Christmas lights from static to action. All you have to do is plug the Christmas tree outlet expander into the wall, then plug your Christmas lights into the three outlets provided. And that’s pretty much it, well not including setting up the tree, untangling the lights, getting out all the ornaments, etc. That stuff will take hours. This takes probably a good minute or two.
The snowman shaped remote controls the lights for you, which is handy even if you’re not going to jazz up the lights because then you don’t have to unplug the lights at night. Instead, you can use this remote to turn the lights on/off, using the corresponding buttons (which just happen to be the snowman’s eyes) from up to 50 feet away! The snowman’s middle buttons activate the different light settings available, which are: fading, flashing, chasing, and random. You know what else is cool? The snowman remote is an ornament, so you can hang it right on your tree, or maybe cleverly hidden across the room so you can secretly harass your family by turning the lights on and off making your living room resemble a rave. You know, whichever seems more in tune with your interests.
5 out of 5 stars.
Specs:
-Dimensions: 10″ H
-Ornament transmitter turns on/off the plugged in Christmas lights
-Can set lights to fading, flashing, chasing or random
-Works through walls, doors, and windows from 50′ away
-LED Indicator on both transmitter and receiver
-Frequency: 315Mhz
-125V/6A/750W Tungsten
-60Hz, 1/3 motor load
