With the rate that technology is increasing, there’s always something bigger and better out there. Whether you’re looking at cell phones, computers, or even calculators, it seems like you just can’t catch up. Basically, every time you buy something that you think is totally awesome, prepare for it to be considered “outdated” the very next day. This notion is particularly relevant when discussing video game systems. I mean, as soon as you get completely addicted to one console, they come out with something so fantastic that you just have to have it. Too bad you just spent all your money on that Playstation 3 because Mario Kart on the Wii looks pretty sweet. So you spend all your time collecting new games and systems, and there’s nothing wrong with that, but what about all your old gaming technology? Is it just supposed to sit there, brutally cast aside and gathering dust? Perhaps there’s a way to revive these games of old…
You can relive your childhood all over again with the Retro Mini Handheld NES System (ThinkGeek, $49.99). Not only do you get the chance to whip out your Dr. Mario skills again, but you can play just about anywhere (although I wouldn’t recommend underwater) with this portable gaming device. You read that right – this handheld supports your original full-size NES cartridges. I mean, why just discard all those old NES cartridges you’ve accumulated just because there’s another new, flashy game out there? Don’t you remember all the good times you had with the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? Here’s your chance to reunite with them! Sure, the 2.4″ LCD TFT screen might be a little smaller than the TV you played on in 1985 (or maybe it’s not), but I think you’ll rise to the challenge. And hey, if you decide that you need more magnification, this handheld comes with composite video/audio out cables so you can jack right into your TV. Otherwise, all you need is a package of AA batteries and you’re set for about eight hours.
Remember how excited you were when you first opened that Nintendo Entertainment System on Christmas Day? That sheer joy you experienced as you ripped off that wrapping paper and realized that this was the best day of your life thus far? Now think about how great it would be to feel that way again. I think this calls for Christmas in July. You get the wrapping paper and I’ll set up the tree.
5 out of 5 stars.
Specs:
-Dimensions: 15cm x 9cm x 4cm
-2.4″ LCD TFT screen
-Plays original full size NES cartridges
-Built in speakers
-Headphone out jack
-Includes composite (NTSC) video/audio out cables for playing on a TV
-Uses 4 AA batteries (not included)
-Runs for over 8 hours on single set of batteries
-NES cartridges not included
I’ve always been a big fan of art. I mean, who doesn’t like art? It’s true, I did meet someone once who said, “I hate art!” as if it was something to be proud of, but other than that, pretty much everyone else I know is a fan. One of my favorite things about art is that it doesn’t just have to look nice, but it can actually be useful. Sure, every home needs a little decor to make it unique, but there’s only so many paintings and area rugs that you can add to a room. Before you know it, you’ve got a gazillion pieces of art but nowhere to sit down or put your stuff. Not really that great, now is it? If you had a functioning piece of art, then you’d be able to use it on a daily basis and all your friends would be intensely jealous.
One way to make that happen would be with the Branches Jewelry Organizer/Coat Rack (Wrapables, $29.99). I mean, the name kinda says it all – you’ve got two things in one (3, if you count the art aspect of it), which is awesome. Now a lot of the time if you’re sharing a space with someone, whether it be parents, roommates, girlfriend/boyfriends, etc., you’ve got to compromise. Basically, you’ve got to hope that the other person doesn’t bring a lot of shitty possessions into your cramped living space. Because this rack is fairly neutral (who doesn’t love a good tree now and then), it’s bound to fit in not only with your fellow living companions, but also the room’s ambiance. I mean, you’ve got something for the ladies (jewelry organizer) as well as a funky looking coat rack that everyone can enjoy.
Who says, “I hate art”? I mean, really, who utters those words? I’d accept, “I’m not a big fan of art” or even “Art just isn’t my thing,” but to say that you hate it is just ridiculous. Besides the fact that I’m pretty sure there’s no way that someone could hate all art because who’s the define what art even is, why would you even say that? Unless of course you’re an asshole, then that’s a great way to tip someone off when you first meet them.
4 out of 5 stars.
Specs:
-Can be used as jewelry organizer or coat rack
-Hardware included for mounting
Sometimes it’s not enough to be a committed adult beverage drinker. Sometimes, to be considered a true “Wino,” you just have to go that extra mile. Now, there are many ways you could go about expanding your fermented grape horizons. You could become one of those cork smelling, sherry swilling, and alcohol spitting drinkers. But come on, where’s the fun in that? Yeah, it might seem like fun for awhile, but the novelty wears off when you realize that no one cares about your useless wine knowledge. In fact, I’m gonna come right out and say it: you’re pretentious. It hurts, I know, but I’m here to tell you that there’s a better way to enjoy your favorite brand of liquid courage. So pour a glass, sit down, and shut up.
Not only do you get to enjoy a glass of wine with the Glass Tank (Generate Design, $339.00), but you also get to look totally boss while doing it. Now, I know this contraption may look a little strange at first glance, so let me talk you through it. You fill up the wine goblet and its little spare tank until the spare tank is full. The awesome thing about this gadget is that the wine never overflows the glass. No really, I mean it! The balance between the air pressure and water pressure keeps the wine at a constant level within the glass. Basically, it’s like walking around with a bottle of wine and a glass, except conveniently all in one. Not only do you not have to worry about carrying around a whole bottle of wine, but you don’t even have to bother refilling your glass because it’s done for you automatically. Pretty nifty, eh?
My one little issue with this personal Maitre d’ is that I would be afraid on constantly bonking myself in the face with the spare tank. I mean, I understand that the angles have to be just so in order for the tank to be fully operational, but I’m just looking at this from a heavy drinking standpoint. Just how many glasses of wine do you think you can have before you’re hitting yourself in the face? Well, you better figure it out before you start. A goose egg on the forehead is not pretty, my friends. I speak from experience.
3 out of 5 stars.
Specs:
-Dimensions: 5.2″ x 3.2″ x 8.7″
-Made of heat resistant glass
-Wine constantly refills itself
-Never overflows
You know when you’re dead tired and you climb into bed, and once you get all comfortable, you realize that you have to go to the bathroom? It happens to the best of us, right? And like any other human being, you probably just lay there and hope the urge will go away so you can sleep. And it does, eventually. But then you inevitably wake up a few hours later, after dreaming about bathrooms, and you think that you should probably get out of bed and go to the bathroom before you pee the bed. So you stumble out of bed, ramming your shin into the box spring in your sleepiness, and you finally make it to the bathroom. But you’re a little hasty and you don’t turn on the light right away. What happens? You miss the bowl. So now it’s 3am and you’ve got a puddle of urine on your floor. Either you clean it up then or you let it sit for another couple of hours. Neither seems advisable.
This could all have been avoided if you had just installed the Johnny Light (Convenient Gadgets & Gifts, $11.95). This light goes in your toilet bowl and lights it up when the toilet seat is lifted. Sure, it’s a simple idea, but it’s the simple things that are often heralded as genius. Not only does the light automatically come on when you lift the seat, but it also turns off when you put the lid down. With no tools required and batteries included, this light is fantastically easy to install.
Just think of how many messes you’ll avoid with such a contraption! Wait, scratch that, think about the arguments you won’t be having. I mean, how many times have you had to have “the talk” with your wife/girlfriend about your inability to aim correctly? You won’t have to worry about that anymore. I’m not saying that you won’t have to hear about putting the toilet seat down, but maybe in time the glowing green light emanating from the porcelain bowl will remind you. And if not, at least you’ve avoided one argument. What’s that, one out of 698,514?
5 out of 5 stars.
Specs:
-Lights toilet bowl at night
-Green light activated when toilet seat is raised
-Light goes off when toilet seat is down
-Installs easily
-No tools needed
-Duracell batteries included
You know what sucks? A party foul. We’ve all been there. You’re having a great time at someone’s house, drinking a few adult beverages and shooting the shit, when all of a sudden someone spills a drink. Sure, it’s not the end of the world, but it is a party pauser if I ever saw one. Most of the time when someone spills a drink it’s because they’re trying to bring over drinks for about fifteen people all at once. You’ve seen them, a crowd of beers clutched to their chest and two hands full of six wineglasses. It’s really just a matter of time before one of those drinks bites the dust.
All the mess could be easily avoided if you just invested in the Large Non-Slip Tray (Drinkstuff, £9.98). Not only does it make carrying multiple drinks easier, but you don’t even have to be a savvy waiter to pull it off. The secret of this tray lies in its Progrip rubber, a surface so slip resistant that you can cart around a tray full of beverages and not have to worry about them toppling over. Sure, you could get a regular plain old tray and try using that, but just me know how long that lasts. You may think you’ve got steady hands, but you might want to factor in the number of tequila shooters you plan on doing throughout the night. Reconsidered, eh?
I can just see it now: you’re floating around the party scene like a butterfly, handing out drinks like they’re flower nectar. You accidentally stumble over an empty beer can and you’re balance begins to waver. All eyes are on you as you and the drink tray sway back and forth. But no, there will be no spills today, thank you very much. Crisis averted.
4 out of 5 stars.
Specs:
-Dimensions: 20mm diameter
-Weight: 430g
-Progrip rubber surface
-Helps stop glasses from sliding
-Reduces accidental breakages
-Perfect for serving drinks at a busy party
-Not available for delivery in US or Canada
