The end of January is almost here, and you know what that means: Valentine’s Day. I’m pretty sure everywhere you look you’re already being bombarded by sickening messages of love, giant displays of heart-shaped candy boxes, and basically anything of the red and pink variety. A lot of people out there, myself included, tend to overlook the possible merits of Valentine’s Day (the heartwarming sentiments) and prefer to focus on reality (a holiday created by card companies to sell more useless products). I mean, why is February 14th so special? Why is that the day where we’re supposed to shower our loved ones with gifts and affection (but most importantly, gifts)? Shouldn’t we be treating our significant others like they matter every day instead of one random day in February? And what about those poor unfortunate souls who are miserable and alone? It’s not like they need another reminder that no one’s interested in them and they’re not getting any younger.
One of the Valentine’s Day staples is the candy heart. Certainly not the most flavorful or exciting of the bunch, the candy heart has become a mainstay because it’s quirky. It’s the little sayings on each heart that make candy hearts special; you never know what you’re gonna get. The Bittersweets (ThinkGeek, $5.99) by Despair, Inc. take that idea and run with it – kicking and screaming in the opposite direction. Instead of spouting sickeningly sweet sentiments, these candy hearts tell it like it is and speak to the singleton in all of us. You can choose from dejected, dysfunctional, or dumped and each set comes packaged in a collectible tin. There are up to 37 unique sayings inside each collection that cater to the “D” you select.
Single people should get their own holiday. I mean, there are so many holidays that are built around togetherness and everlasting love – what about the rest of us?! I mean, I guess you could technically annex St. Patrick’s Day as a singleton holiday, but I’m talking about a true Singles Day. Write in and tell me your suggestions!
5 out of 5 miserable stars.
Specs:
-3 different collections to choose from: Dejected, Dysfunctional, or Dumped
-Each collection features up to 37 unique sayings
-Packaged in a collectible tin
