If I were you, I would be thinking about investing in the Escape Hammer (Walter Drake, $8.99). If you had this tiny tool, you could sleep soundly at night, confident that you could survive a water immersion. What’s the deal with this emergency escape tool? Well, on one end there are double-sided steel tips, which are able to puncture your car windows. This comes in handy when you have automatic windows that won’t roll down once your car is underwater. All you have to do is whack the steel tip against your window, causing the window to shatter enough so you can kick your way out and swim to the surface. Otherwise, doors locked and windows up, you’re sleeping with the fishes. The other end of the tool has a seat belt cutter, which is also a good thing because breaking your window is really of no use to you if you’re still stuck in your seat. While seat belts are an effective safety precaution in car accidents, you don’t want to be stuck in one if your car is in the bottom of a lake. All you have to do is use the razor to saw through the super durable seat belt material and then you’re free – minus the whole stuck in a car underwater thing, but that’s why this tool is a twofer. There’s also a glow in the dark tab to make this tool a little easier to find in the dark, which is good because I bet it’s probably wicked dark 20,000 leagues under the sea.

This could make a very thoughtful gift. You could give it to the person you love, perhaps with a note that says something to the effect of, “I hope you don’t crash into a lake, only to die in an automobile grave surrounded by water.” I’m sure it would go over real well.

5 out of 5 stars.

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