When you’re in college, it seems like just about every night is spent out at the bar. Sometimes, it can get a little out of hand and before you know it, you’re stranded out in the middle of town without a way home. What’s to do then but call a cab, right? Well yeah, that would work if you could remember where you lived. I mean, it’s pretty hard to get home in one piece if you can’t communicate coherently to the driver. So you could either live at the bar (trust me, you don’t want to do that) or you could figure something else out.
That “something else” option will most likely be the Dear Cab Driver Cocktail Bar Napkins (Kegworks, $8.95), as it doesn’t interfere with your unhealthy habit of drinking until dawn. Arm yourself with this handy fill-in-the-blank napkin, and you’re sure to get home safe (as long as you have an understanding cab driver, that is). I’d recommend filling out the pertinent information before you get to the bar, or at the very least before you start drinking. This napkin has it all – your address, payment location, and even an expression of gratitude. Do your cab driver a favor though and don’t put your money in your boxer shorts or thong because that’s mega gross for everyone.
The key here is not losing this napkin before you call the cab, and that’s a pretty big hurdle.
4 out of 5 stars.
Specs:
-Dimensions: 5″ x 5″
-Includes 100 informative napkins
-Made of paper
I know it’s a little early to be thinking about Halloween, but realistically you’ve only got a couple of months to get together a kickass costume. That’s not a lot of time if you’re going to go the totally awesome (and only acceptable) route and make your own costume. And if you’re going to throw a Halloween party, you’d better start planning your shindig because scary spooktaculars don’t throw themselves.
When preparing for a Halloween extravaganza, the important thing to remember is to really run with the theme. Anything and everything that can be Halloweenized should be, including yourself. The Spooky X-Ray Skeleton Bones Apron (Plasticland, $29.00) is a great way to get into the holiday spirit when making dirt or shrunken apple heads. For one thing, you won’t get fake blood and other tasty delights all over your killer crazy costume. Alternatively, if you’re the type of total lameoid who doesn’t dress up for Halloween, you can at least pretend to be in the spirit with this apron. Bonus: it doesn’t have to be All Hallow’s Eve to wear this skeletal garment.
If you’re looking for theme-appropriate cuisine to serve at your party, check out this blog for super easy yet incredibly impressive ideas.
4 out of 5 stars.
Specs:
-Dimensions: 34″ long
-Screen printed skeleton bones graphic
-Adjustable neck strap
-Waist tie
-Available in pink pop, licorice black, or acid green
-Made of 100% cotton
-Machine wash
There are some days when nothing seems to go right. Some days, it’s all you can do to just keep your cool and not freak out over the smallest detail that has gone awry. I like to think that on those types of days that I possess the necessary self-control to conduct myself in a professional manner. Unfortunately, that’s rarely the case.
When I feel like I can’t take it anymore, I reach for the Stress Beater (Perpetual Kid, $7.99). Instead of literally blowing a fuse at work and screaming about “burning this mother down,” I slowly squeeze my stress buster. I could use one of those dinky little stress balls, the kind that usually has a smiley face printed on the side, but that shit only makes me what to punch something more. And hey, what’s better for stress punching than a pair of squishy brass knuckles? You can live out your tough guy fantasies without actually harming anyone (trust me, your lawyer will thank you).
You show those TPS reports who’s boss.
4 out of 5 stars.
Specs:
-Dimensions: 4″ x 3″ x 0.5″
-Squeezable stress releaser
It’s Wednesday, the middle of the week, and for some reason this does nothing to perk me up. Sure, there’s a holiday weekend coming up so I should be pretty stoked, but all I can think of is how much still has to get done between now and then. It’s days like this when it seems like the week might never end.
The only way to get through a week that’s dragging along is to keep yourself going. This can mean throwing yourself into your work or distracting yourself with something completely ridiculous. Guess which one I’m going for? The Creative Outlets Stickers (Perpetual Kid, $3.49) should make it pretty clear that I’m all about silly diversions to make the day go by faster. A really good distraction doesn’t completely take away from the task at hand, instead giving a brief moment of reprieve from whatever is vexing you. These stickers are perfect for that. Come on, what could be more gigglesome than putting funny faces on your outlets? Not a whole lot, that’s for sure. And once you’ve had a good laugh, you can pull it together and get on with your work day.
Note: Multiple outlet adornments and viewings may be required to accelerate time passage.
3 out of 5 stars.
Specs:
-Dimensions: 7″ x 3.75″ (per sheet)
-Funny outlet stickers
-Printed on glossy vinyl
I’m all for pranks, especially when pulled on known pranksters. There’s just something about scaring the bejesus out of someone for your own personal benefit that appeals to me. Of course, it helps if the person in question has done the very same thing to you in the past because then there’s a sense of accomplishment when you one-up them.
The trick is to catch your mark at where they’ll be most vulnerable so that even if they suspect you’re plotting against them, defenses will be down. Using this bit of advice as a guideline, the best place to stage a prank is clearly the bathroom. The Toilet Monster (Perpetual Kid, $16.99) is the perfect accessory for a bathroom prankster. A creepy monster popping up out of the toilet is sure to scare the pants off anyone and this green goblin is no exception. Attach the monster to the lid of the toilet seat via suction cups, close the lid, and wait for your prank to play out.
Great green globs of greasy grimy gopher guts, indeed. This thing is nasty looking and sure would scare the crap out of me (luckily, I’d be the bathroom).
3 out of 5 stars.
Specs:
-Toilet prank
-Attaches via suction cups
-Reusable
