I know you’re not supposed to illegally download music, but sometimes it’s just way too easy. I’m not saying that I do it (because that would be wrong), I’m just saying that a lot of my friends do. And since they’re already doing it, why can’t I benefit from it, right? What’s a little song sharing between friends? That’s how artists get their music heard, by other people sharing it with their friends. So really, I’m just doing my part to help out the music business.
The thing that sucks about sharing music, legal or otherwise, is that it’s such a pain in the ass. If I have a song on my iPod, I can’t just give it to you. The only way for you to access it is to hook your iPod up to my computer with my iTunes. And let’s just hope that you’ve altered your iPod’s settings before jacking in or you can kiss all your music goodbye. What a lovely little feature that is – thank you, Apple. Luckily, the Easy iPod Media Sharer (Hammacher Schlemmer, $99.95) can save you a lot of time and effort when it comes to music sharing. All you have to do is hook up both your iPods to the media sharer. That’s it. Seriously. A fully charged media sharer yields up to an hour and a half of transfer sharing, although I don’t know who needs that much time because it doesn’t take that much time to transfer files. A three-minute songs takes about five seconds while a 30-minute video is transferred in three minutes. And as a bonus, the media sharer will even charge your iPods while they’re connected so you won’t lose any juice.
The only thing that sucks about this little gadget is that it’s not compatible with the iPhone or iPod Touch. As in, will not work. What’s up with that? Is the technology between this one Apple product and two other incredibly similar Apple product so different that it’s not compatible? That’s just laziness. Believe me, I know lazy when I see it.
4 out of 5 stars.
Specs:
-Dimensions: 3/4″ x 2 1/4″ x 3 1/2″
-Easily transfers media between two iPods
-Includes AC adapter to recharge device in 4 hours
-iPods are recharged when connected
-Provides up to 1 1/2 hours of operation during transfers
-Not compatible with iPhone or iPod Touch
There’s a whole mess of literature out there that talks about how important it is to properly prepare for the birth of your child. I’ll venture to guess that a lot of you already know the obvious guidelines for the mother-to-be: eat healthy, no smoking/drinking, exercise, etc. Then there’s the whole nesting side of preparations, making sure that you’ve baby-proofed the house and set up the baby’s room (he’s sure to complain if the decor isn’t high quality). So you’d think that you have all your bases covered, right? Well, what about all that time little Eugene or little Helga spends gestating in the penthouse suite of the Holiday Womb?
The Prenatal Musical System (ThinkGeek, $99.99) is the most advanced and complete method of delivering auditory sounds to your unborn child. I mean, you must have heard how much knowledge fetuses can retain while in the womb, so it seems like a no-brainer that you should start educating them early. Now, I’m not saying that you’ll play them some Hooked On Phonics and they’ll come out spouting off full sentences, but it’s not like it could hurt, right? Also, what about music? It’s supposed to soothe babies and babies are thought to recall songs they heard while gestating. Using a four speaker surround sound system, this contraption safely delivers sound to your unborn child in an optimally balanced and effective way, no matter where the baby is hanging out your belly. There are built-in side pockets to house the device’s audio controller as well as your personal MP3 player, you can host a hands-free concert while your baby listens to some tunes. The unit is lightweight and elasticized with a streamlined design, providing new mommies comfort and support while accommodating their growing belly.
My only word of caution would be to make your musical selections carefully. I mean, if you play death metal to your stomach for nine months, the results could be a little scary.
4 out of 5 stars.
Specs:
-Provides gentle but effective support
-Convenient side pockets
-Hands free experience
-High quality sound
-Continually adjusts volume to optimal fetal levels
-4 speaker surround sound from 2 separate stereo speaker sets
-Fully charged battery lasts approximately 5 hours
-Washable fabric
-Made of lightweight, elasticized fabric
Wowza, there’s only 11 days left until Christmas! I really hope you’ve started your Christmas shopping, or at the very least starting thinking of gift ideas because time is just going to fly by from now on. Unless you’re a child under the age of 10, then it will pass slower than molasses in January. Now, I know we talked about maybe different kinds of gifts for the varying types of people in your life. One such type is that of the terrible gift giver. Year after year, this person gives you the worst gifts humanly possible. You would just as soon receive nothing than have to figure out what you’re going to do with a talking yard gnome or yet another ugly Christmas sweater. What’s even worse than getting a bad gift? Getting a bad gift from someone that you bought an extremely awesome gift. Not only did you spend precious time and money on these gifts, but you really thought about what your recipient wanted for Christmas. Whereas they just scrounged around the “Half Off” bin, thus explaining your gift last year of footie pajamas. It’s time to take a stand against thoughtless gift giving!
I’m all about making sure the gift suits the person receiving it, but sometimes you’ve got to go all out to teach someone a lesson. The Christmas Yule Log DVD (Walter Drake, $14.99) is sure to get your point across this holiday season. Sure, on the surface there’s nothing wrong with a good ole fireplace on TV, but let’s delve a little deeper. What does this gift say about the recipient? That they love fireplaces? That they’re too poor/cheap to afford an actual fireplace? Do they think a fireplace DVD is the perfect cost-effective way to heat their home?may surface during the 80 minute DVD, but chances are you’ll all be too busy listening to the 29 Christmas songs to address them.
Now, I’m not advocating buying someone a present with the hopes that they’ll hate it. That’s not the point at all. What I’m saying is, why waste time worrying about what to get someone who clearly isn’t doing the same? Who knows, you might even get lucky and find someone who absolutely loves video fireplaces. Like a woodstove salesman.
5 out of 5 faux fire stars.
Specs:
-Duration: 80 minutes
-Plays 29 songs These questions and many, many others
Turkey day is coming up – are you ready for all that massive food consumption? Sure, you can prepare your body for the onslaught of sugar and carbs it’s about to intake, but are you ready to face the toughest challenge of all? That’s right, hanging out with the fam. Before you start thinking that you’ve got this meal covered, let me remind you of what you’re in for. This is the time where your family grills you about your love life (“When are you going to get married?”), your job (“What do you want to do with your life?”), and other general critiques about your lifestyle (“Are you sure you want to eat that second helping of mashed potatoes?”). If only there was a way to take the focus off you, for once!
Thankfully (yes, I went there), if you show up with the Thanksgiving Hoedown Musical Turkey Doll (Amazon, $34.99), there’s a 99.9% chance that no one will bother you for the rest of the day. All you have to do is whip out this stuffed turkey, and you’re in business. Well, ok, maybe that’s not all you have to do. You should probably press the on/off switch, located on the turkey’s foot, or it’ll just be you holding a stuffed turkey (and not the kind you eat). Once you press the magical button, this turkey will move his head and mouth as he “sings” a “Hoedown Thanksgiving.” I mean, come on what could be better than that? Let me rephrase: what could be better than that at taking the attention off you? Absolutely nothing.
Who needs to bring a significant other to dinner when you could bring a singing turkey? Clearly an attention-grabber, your turkey will be the talk of the dinner table! Although, you might want to wait until dessert to bust him out – you wouldn’t want him to see his brother as the main course, now would you?
5 out of 5 embarrassed turkey stars.
Specs:
-Dimensions: 8″ x 8″ x 11″
-Weight: 1.3lbs
-Wingspread crafted in calico and corduroy
-Press his foot to make his head and mouth move as he sings “Hoedown Thanksgiving”
-Uses 3 AAA batteries (included)
I hate when you’re out with your friends and you’re talking about this awesome new song you just downloaded (legally, of course), but no one has any idea what you’re talking about. So you get this bright idea to whip out your iPod so they can hear it for themselves. No big deal, right? Well, I guess not really, but I could poke a few holes in this scenario. For one, who wants to put your crusty ear buds in their own ear? I mean, it might be different if they just happen to traveling with a pair of their own, but seriously, no one wants to swap ear wax just to listen to a song. And two, say your friends and you are so tight that they don’t even notice the amount of wax build-up on your ear buds, I’m not gonna judge you but what about if you have more than one friend who wants to listen to your spectacular music discovery? Do you really expect them to just sit around twiddling their thumbs while your “best friend” gets to go first? You’re basically starting a turf war, when all you wanted to do was broaden everyone’s musical horizons.
If only you had the Keychain Speaker Amp (ThinkGeek, $9.99), then none of this would even be an issue. See, this little device attaches to your keychain, so you’re pretty much always guaranteed to have it on you. How it works is by using any standard headphone input jack to connect to iPods, cell phones, and pretty much any other device you want to get music from. The genius of this tiny amp is that it blasts your music so that everyone around you can hear it. Now, I’m not talking about crazy loud Radio Raheem music amplification, but it’s more than enough to entertain you and your friends. Or you could just go the Radio Raheem route and walk around with a giant boombox on your shoulders blasting Public Enemy. Your choice.
“Let me tell you the story of ‘Right Hand, Left Hand.’ It’s a tale of good and evil. Hate: It was with this hand that Cane iced his brother. Love: These five fingers, they go straight to the soul of man. The right hand: the hand of love. The story of life is this: Static. One hand is always fighting the other hand; and the left hand is kicking much ass. I mean, it looks like the right hand, Love, is finished. But, hold on, stop the presses, the right hand is coming back. Yeah, he got the left hand on the ropes, now, that’s right. Ooh, it’s the devastating right and Hate is hurt, he’s down. Left-Hand Hate K.O.ed by Love.”
4 out of 5 stars.
Specs:
-Mini powered amp hangs from your keys
-Standard headphone input jack connects to iPods, cell phones, etc.
-USB charging cable for internal battery
