Do you spend a lot of time thinking about what would happen if someone broke into your house? A friend of mine is constantly preparing for the zombie apocalypse, and while I think that’s a valiant effort, it’s probably a bit more realistic to shield yourself from potential burglars. There are so many vulnerable areas in your home that it can be a bit daunting to protect yourself at every possible angle, but you can make sure that your most precious valuables stay safe.
The key to making your home burglar-proof is of course a good offense like deadbolts and a security system, but what if they manage to get past those? You’d better arm yourself with a baseball bat and your favorite items with the Combination Lock Book Safe (Things You Never Knew Existed, $24.98). Sure, this book makes you look like a dictionary enthusiast, but it also protects your valuables with a secret safe compartment! This fake dictionary features a built-in steel box that is apparently large enough to store a handgun (if you were so inclined) and is protected by a 3-digit combination lock. Since most burglars are on a time clock, you’ll probably be able to fool them by storing your goodies in this cleverly disguised safe.
Unfortunately, you’ll be sacrificing the actual dictionary in favor of storing your stuff. Tough break.
4 out of 5 stars.
Specs:
- -Dimensions: 2.75″ x 8″ x 9.5″ (inside)
- -Hide goods in plain sight
- -Built in steel box
- -3 digit combination lock
Have you ever been mugged? These days, it seems like there’s so much temptation for street thieves that has nothing to do with the few dollars you have in your wallet. Who cares about a couple bucks when you could be walking around with a shiny new watch on your wrist or listening to some tunes on a brand new iPod? It would certainly suck to lose those materialistic things, but it would be even worse to have information stolen. Photos and documents are a goldmine!
They always say to just give a mugger what he wants, but what if he doesn’t know what to look for? The USB Locket (Generate Design, $229.00) looks like a generic piece of jewelry but actually encases a small flash drive. So instead of carrying your secrets around on a flash drive tucked into your purse or computer bag, why not put it where it would really be safe: around your neck. The locket comes in a standard size or mini and both styles include the 2GB flash drive that fits perfectly inside.
If your lovely lady is a techie nerd, then this is the perfect gift to completely geek her out.
3 out of 5 stars.
Specs:
-Dimensions: 1.5″ x 1.5″ x 0.5″ (regular); 1.5″ x 1″ x 0.5″ (mini)
-Length: 30″ (regular); 24″ (mini)
-Capacity: 2GB flash drive
-Includes locket and flash drive
-Brass chain
-Locket made of satin gold plated brass
I try to be responsible and keep all my important documents in one place so that in case there’s some sort of emergency like an earthquake or hurricane, I’ll be prepared. That being said, my most important bits of information aren’t exactly safe in terms of theft. Gee, I wonder if someone could steal my identity if they had my passport and every other bit of residential proof they need to become me on paper? Well, the joke’s on them because I’m gonna start locking that shit up.
You can stick all the important documents you like in a fireproof safe or in a safety deposit box at the bank, but nothing is as securely portable as the Mobi Safe (Convenient Gadgets & Gifts, $13.95). Just large enough to protect the essentials, this safe comes complete with a 4-digit combination lock and a vinyl coated aircraft steel cable. So you could even tether this safe to your wrist if you felt that such a drastic action was necessary. Personally, the combo lock is enough peace of mind for me.
Why trust a sketchy hotel safe when you can lock up your cash in this thing instead?
4 out of 5 stars.
Specs:
-Portable safe
-Holds small objects like phone and cash
-4 digit Combination lock
-Vinyl coated aircraft steel cable
I’m not advocating sneaking liquor into your favorite location, but if you need to do it then the Bootlegger Mini Liquor Bottle Ankle Concealer (Kegworks, $12.95) is a perfectly viable option. The pros of using this device are that hardly anybody is gonna be checking your ankles for hidden booze, it fits just about anyone, and it makes for easy drink access. However, its options are kind of limiting: you can only wear loose-fitting pants (it would be a little obvious with skinny jeans or a skirt), it only holds miniature liquor bottles (those things are hideously marked up), and the liquor bottles aren’t included. Ok, so that last one is really more of a quibble.
If you’re hiding booze on your ankle, perhaps you need to rethink your priorities.
.
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3 out of 5 stars.
Specs:
-Size: one size fits most
-Capacity: 6 miniature liquor bottles
-Fits snugly around the ankle
-Ideal for sporting events, concerts, beach, etc
-Liquor bottles not included
-Made of spandex and elastic
Is the government watching your every move? Are you convinced there’s a tap on your phone? Is that an unmarked cop car sitting outside your apartment? Seriously, you’re probably just imagining it. Your life can’t be so interesting that you think someone else really wants to tail your every movement. Although, stranger things have happened so you can’t completely rule it out.
For the easily paranoid, the Hidden Camera Detector (ThinkGeek, $21.99) can help ease your mind. If you think you’re secretly being recorded, this device will detect it. About the size of a lighter, you can carry it everywhere and you’ll always know if someone is recording you because the device will alert you with both a blinking LED light and an audible alarm. With a multi-scanning auto sensitivity tuner and background noise elimination, you can easily detect frequencies between 50 MHz and 3 GHz.
You know how paranoid people like to think that everyone is out to get them? Isn’t that kind of a self-fulfilling prophecy? I mean, if you’re acting all sketch city, sooner or later you’re gonna do something mega crazy and get locked up for it.
3 out of 5 stars.
Specs:
-Easily detects hidden cameras
-Size similar to lighter
-Auto sensitivity tuner
-Audio and LED alarm
-Background noise elimination
-Multi channel scanning
-Detects frequencies from 50 MHz to 3 GHz
-Uses 2 CR2032 lithium batteries (included)
